Often in life, we hold onto such regret in our past for things we have done, people we have hurt, mistakes we have made and people we have let down.
Time moves on, but we haven’t. I’m sure you can all pinpoint that moment when you knew everything changed with a friend, or the mistake you made that lost someone’s trust.
Like a broken vase, you piece it back together, despite how many cuts your fingers get in the attempt to do so. There are some things in life we try to restore only when, in attempting to do so, we recreate something that looks similar,but can never be the same.
Sometimes, we hurt ourselves more by trying to restore things. There are some lines that get crossed, and no matter how much we try to backpedal over them, nothing changes. Something entirely new is created and a hidden scar in your hearts prevails only to have you live with the wound.
We try to hide things to protect the people we care about. We don’t tell them if someone speaks ill of them because we would rather hold that secret in our heart than see them go through an ounce of pain knowing what people say.
Sometimes we lie to ourselves, doing things no one will approve of, and we try to justify our actions as we look ourselves in the mirror. The thing about lies, however, is eventually they come out. When the truth is ugly, people keep it hidden like skeletons in a closet.
So, how do we deal with things we run from, conclusions that never actually got closure or a goodbye without the word? How do we forgive ourselves for mistakes we have made and people we once hurt in the discovery to figure out who we are today?
It starts by forgiving yourself for the past. Sit down and actually accept what happened; take full responsibility. You may never get apologies you think you deserve, and you may never take back the words you said that hurt someone.
You cannot think about a mistake you made and let it eat away at you from the inside out. Remember, if we made no mistakes in life, we wouldn’t be people who learn. As people, we strive on learning and taking one step at a time, moving forward slowly.
While some things get destroyed and ruined in the process, other things get rebuilt stronger and better. You can’t undo the past, no matter how much you would like to.
As people, we can only look at ourselves in the mirror, own up to mistakes that have occurred, forgive ourselves, forgive others who have betrayed us and seek forgiveness where we need to.
Some people won’t take your apology, no matter how many times you say it. People on their death beds regret so much — the relationships they didn’t try to fix when they had time, the mistakes they never forgave themselves for — and they die with the guilt that ate away at them for so long.
You must forgive yourself for mistakes, no matter how big or small. They made you exactly who you are today, and you are stuck with yourself the rest of your life. It’s time to accept your past and move forward.